ll right. I’m no hipster, I’m not going to pretend I am. I think the Strokes are still hip, okay - so by that logic, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs have to be the next Beatles (or at least the next Vines). Their debut EP is a fantastic, sub-15 minute bitch-slap of everything that’s great about "new garage": it brings the rock, it’s exciting, horribly derivative, totally cool, and pumped with a big fat sneer.


So what the hell happened? The Machine EP is a bizarre experiment for the YYYs: is this studio-glazed rocker the one that will show their true colors - or is this just a little endeavor to see what they can pull off? Either way, I’m pretty pissed. Where’s the Karen O I knew and loved - you know, that girl with a helluva stylist, defiant glare, and fishnet leggings with the inner thighs cut out? I want that "ta ta, now it’s time to rock" ‘tude back that made this trio so exciting. It’s sure not here, though.


The opening title track is pretty cool; a mix of surf-punk guitar and propulsive drumming make this song the album highlight, easily - I don’t even mind the singing through a megaphone thing, ‘cause this creepy three-minute clip nearly does what the first EP did so well: it excites you. It stirs you, it gets you up. That’s what I want outta this genre. The next track does the job, too, "Graveyard," a metal-thrash number with vocals from O that alternate between a tinny wail and a sexy, low rumble. When listening to these, though, you tell yourself, “Hey, this is all right - but is this really better than the last record”? Sadly, the answer is no. When O cries "I kissed you once / I’ll kiss you twice," that’s nice and all, but what happened to "as a fuck son, you suck"? That precious sexual urgency is just gone on this EP - where the airy vocal on this one is "selfish things wash over me," which I guess is cool in that sort of metaphorical/sexual/thinly veiled love sort of game, on Yeah Yeah Yeahs it was "the bigger, the better" in a country sneer with a "bang, bang, bang!"


Maybe Karen O suddenly decided the feminist bad-ass would suddenly be the cool route to go down, instead of the, say, Justine Frischmann "you can’t get up, you sack of shit" deal. And reader, honestly, which is more fun and entertaining? I guess that’s the theme of this record - are they growing up? Are they trying new shit - or, are the YYYs just trying to be ironic, to mess with us, the listeners? Where on Yeah Yeah Yeahs we had the uber-ironic "AAAAAAARRRRRRRTTTTTT STTTTTTTAAAAARRRRRR!!!!" followed by a few "do-do-do-do"s for kicks, on this one, we get "Pin (Remix)," with Karen O musing "don’t touch me," over and over, in a wash of guitar clang and subtle drums. It sounds like PJ Harvey via Blur’s 13- the studio is the other instrument here, and the neo-feminist wails make it sound "righteous." But is this ironic, too? That a band known for their exhilarating live shows with beer and sweat and sex everywhere created what is essentially an ambient track? Nonetheless, this track pales in comparison to the already flaccid other tracks on this record; it feels forced, contrived, and unnecessary - on a seven-minute EP, that’s not such a good sign.


So, do the Yeah Yeah Yeahs have what it takes to make an Is This It? If this lazy venture is any indication - no.