I cop a lot of shit about my taste in music. Strange as it may seem, even though I’m a too-cool-for-school music writer, my opinions don’t command much respect amongst those I call my friends. They know that when you attack the music, you attack me. It’s all harmless, really—jibing designed to draw a reaction. Nevertheless, the constant barbs whenever someone looks through my record collection—“it’s all rawk and guitars,” “it’s all Australian,” “You Am I is a shit band”—start to get to me.
But today, on the 22nd anniversary of my glorious arrival on this planet, I will not stand for the insults. My music will take center stage. I shall sing it loud and sing it proud, because—goddamn it—it’s my party and I’ll play what I want to.
Regurgitator - “!*(The Song Formerly Known As)”
These Australians made some excellent irreverent albums in the mid 90s, fusing hip-hop and later 80s electro-pop. Before their gradual decline post-Millennium Bug—culminating in a cringe-worthy reality TV experiment where they recorded an album inside a giant dome in Melbourne’s Federation Square—their songs featured strong hooks and delicious irony. They won ARIAs (Australia’s answer to the Grammys in every way possible) and commanded television ads for their records. Not bad for a band whose back catalogue includes “I Sucked a Lot of Cock to Get Where I Am.”
This is the best song that Prince never wrote, a pastiche that somehow transcended its origins. A wicked portrayal of socially awkward misfits, its infectious beat appealed to the cool and nerdy kids alike. It is guaranteed to get any Australian child of the 90s onto the dancefloor, even if it’s simply in “the comfort of my lounge room in suburbia.” This song was not meant to connect with anyone, but with its insistent bass riff and high guitar flecks, it’s impossible not to succumb. Thank you Mr DJ, indeed.
The Rolling Stones - “Gimme Shelter”
Whilst this is hardly an obscure album track, this ominous, slinky, recording doesn’t get its due. It’s always lost somewhere between “Satisfaction” and “Ruby Tuesday.”
This is the Stones at their most egalitarian, playing as a single menacing unit. Charlie provides a solid groove under Mick’s cocksure vocal. Apart from a searing solo, Keef provides a controlled yet seductive guitar part, which contrasts starkly with his usual sleaze. Most inspired, however, are Merry Clayton’s vocals, practically bursting her vocal cords in the middle eight. No matter how dark the lyrics or portentous the mood, “Gimme Shelter” is truly exciting. If my friends have any sense they’ll realize that it’s the best thing the Rolling Stones ever did.
You Am I - “Purple Sneakers”
My friends don’t really understand my relationship with You Am I. I don’t think they ever will, because it’s deeply personal. The music affects me deeply. Some songs invigorate me and play to the wannabe rock star within me. Others, like this, tug at the heartstrings. It tells the tale of Tim Rogers being derided at school for wearing a pair of purple sneakers he was given by his father. Sure, I’ve never owned a pair of said footwear, but its thread of quiet alienation (“I just feel better when no-one else is around”) is something I’ve felt before.
Opening with the cleverest opening line this side of the non-existent Glebe Point Bridge “Purple Sneakers” scratches my itch in unexpected ways. For a song about alienation and finding comfort in a bottle of liquor, the chorus plea to “need somebody, to feel somebody” is surprisingly affectionate. Equally unique is how You Am I marry the warm textures of acoustic guitar and Mellotron flourishes with the machine gun drum coda. It may only be a three minute pop/rock song, but “Purple Sneakers” has an emotional and musical depth that still fascinates me.
If only my friends could see the magic in these songs. Twenty-two years walking this globe is a sizeable whack of experience. This music is its soundtrack. Nevertheless, no matter how much I love my music, and how much they hate it, they are still my friends. And on this night I want to hug my comrades as much as my record collection or the drink in my hand. They have stuck by me through thick and thin, and it will be a great time to celebrate. I’ll wear my Vans sneakers especially.